Speak (like the Devil) and Spell (like a fiend)

Recently, while engaged in a nostalgic conversation about my childhood, I remembered my favourite childhood toy. They were simpler times then, I was but a wee little boy (approximately 7 years old) with a thirst for knowledge. The only gaming system was Atari. We actually played outside. You could play outside all day without sunscreen and just get a gradual tan. We had 3 channels on TV. Getting cable and the movie channel were monumental events in my life. From the time I was about 3 to 7, I WAS the remote control for the TV. That was how I learned my numbers (the TV had a rotary dial that went from 2-13). We finally got a TV that had a remote control when I was 7 or so. There was a monthly magazine that served as a guide for the movies playing that month on the movie channel and I always memorized it. I went Rain Man on that thing. My family just asked me what movies were on and I could tell them the title, storyline and if it had scenes of violence, coarse language, or nudity (I always giggled if it did).

This Christmas toy may very well have changed my life. Considering that I am now a writer by trade, it likely played an important part in making this a reality. The toy was a Speak and Spell. For those unfamiliar with this wonderful invention, it basically spoke to you in an evil robot voice and said "SPELL ______!!". I couldn't get enough of it. I went through batteries like they were going out of style, to the point where my parents had to buy me a plug in for it. I cannot stress enough how completely psychedelic the voice on that thing was. I'm lucky I didn't grow up talking like a demon child with a speech impediment. Click on the link, and see for yourself. Now picture the easily moulded mind of a child spending hours a day listening to that voice. It's a miracle in itself I didn't go up to other kids and say "SPELL DODECAHEDRON!!...INCORRECT!". My spelling skills were enhanced beyond belief and I was able to excel on spelling tests in school, quietly accumulating an awe-inspiring collection of "scratch and sniff" stickers. Later on in high school we had a gym teacher that scratched his crotch a lot and he was nicknamed "Scratch and Sniff", that irreparably tainted my affectionate recollection of my sticker collection. I can specifically remember my mom making me spell "carbohydrate" in front of almost anyone that came to the house when I was 7 years old ("Michael come show Thelma what a good speller you are!") and I did my little spelling show like a trained monkey. I was a decent proofreader by the time I was 10 years old. To this day I tend to notice spelling mistakes like a hawk (one of my friends unjustly calls me a "spelling nazi"). I owe this all to a $70 toy bought back in 1984. Thank you Speak and Spell, you've changed my life...