Oh You Like It Don't Ya???

Back in NB I worked at a sporting good store and to say it was slack was an understatement. One of my best friends (AWALL) worked there with me in the footwear section and my roomate (Teeder) at the time worked down at the other end in the hockey section. AWALL coined the phrase "Oh you like it don't ya??" and it soon became part of our regular vocabulary. I'd be eating a chocolate bar and AWALL would say "Oh you like your chocolate bar, don't ya???". The phrase had universal appeal and could be applied to almost anything. We found it funnier than we should have I would say. It had a surprisingly long shelf life as well, I'm talking years here. Finally AWALL and I gradually decided to let it go with the occasional resurrection here and there with hilarity ensuing. The key to the continued enjoyment was the infrequency of use. Teeder didn't quite get this concept and he kept saying it all the time, generally to mixed reviews. He refused to let it die.
Teeder and I had a few guests over on a Friday night and the drinks were flowing quickly. There were likely 15 people in the group and we decided to hit the pub downtown so we all set out on foot for the 10 minute walk. Teeder and I were walking along cracking jokes and all of a sudden I spot this guy crossing the road up ahead with a girl on each arm. Upon further inspection I noticed that the girls are quite attractive and the guy has a mullet. Yes, a mullet. Let me repeat, a mullet. The guy is fiddling with his car keys at the driver's side door and these girls are hanging off him like he is Brad Pitt. As I am about to walk by his car on the passenger's side he seems to notice me staring at him in disbelief and our eyes lock. I yelled out "OH YOU LIKE YOUR MULLET, DON'T YOU?!?!". What happened next was a domino effect of epic proportions. #1) The guy took a step back as if my words struck him upside his face and it just suddenly dawned on him that he did indeed have a mullet. I'm sorry, but you know when you look in your mirror if you have a mullet. If you leave your house with a mullet, expect drunken or sober ridicule. #2) The girls let go of his arms and took a step back from him, looked him up and down and seemed to suddenly realize that he indeed has a mullet. At this point they appear to understand they were that close to getting into a car with a guy with a mullet. The looks on their faces turned quickly from smiles to disgust as they continued to back away from Mullet Boy. I followed up my original comment with "It's Friday night and your mullet's TIGHT!". That fully completed the knockout. Maybe it was a bit too much overkill for the poor fellow but I like to go the extra mile. By this point the girls have totally deserted the guy and are hurriedly walking away down the street, occasionally looking back to make sure their eyes have not deceived them.

At this point we are well past the guy and Teeder is doing everything but peeing his pants laughing. He can literally hardly walk. He just keeps mumbling "Oh you like your mullet don't you??" over and over and wheezing. To this day he still brings up that night when we talk. Just a typical night in my life back in the day, right time-right place. For the mullet guy, wrong place-wrong time. But in all honesty, there is never a good time for a mullet...

Stay thirsty my friends...